aDuLt sMs JoKeSs
Sexy Teacher
A sexy girl goes to a school for a job.
Principal: Can u teach zoology/biology/geology or physiology?
Girl: No i can teach only dalo g and nikaalo g..
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FARAZ ON CONDOMS
Hamaray sabar ki inteha kiya dekhtey ho FARAZ.....
Woh hum se CONDOM mangwa rahi thi kisi or k liye.....!
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Food diminishing Women’s sex
Finally scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by 90%.
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It’s called the Wedding Cake
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New Abbreviations
PIA = Pain In Ur Ass
USA = Under Skirts Activities
PUMA = Press Untill Milk Arrive
ARAB = After Rape Apply Balm
CUBA = Caught Under Bra Area
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Himmat vs Haddi
Arz hai,
Na himmat muj may hai,na mere haddi me..
Himmat to usme hai jo bina haddi ke meri chaddi me hai.
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hahahahah
Tum BALWAN ho to apne BAL se..
Tum DHANWAN ho to apne DHAN se.
Tum SUNDAR ho to apne TAN se.
Tum KOMAL ho to apne MAN se..
Par tum jo bhi ho mere LAND se
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BUBBLI or BCHPAN K DIN
YAAD aate hai BACHPAN ke wo HASiN DiN
HUM apni CHADI KHOL kar BABBLI MANA Liya karte the
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Kudrat aur Kismat
Kya diya kudrat ne zamane ko?
EK diya ghusane ko,
do diya dabane ko,
par kismat ke bat hy MAJOR Rohail k
tuje
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milta hai sirf hilane ko....
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Malam aur Land
Sardar ki GAND par chot lagi,woh aaina rakh kar malam laga raha tha utneme uska land khada ho gaya to sardar bola niche beth ye apni hi gand hai
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MISBA’S HORROR SCOPE
AUNTI MISBA’S HORROR SCOPE
Mon:
Wear thick bra,it’s chili out side,so ur niples may get hard
Tue:
Avoid lukin at boys,cause u may find sm thing geting wet b/n ur legs
Wed:
5,6&7 r ur lucky #s
So keep a measuring tape with u
Thu:
It’s gud day 4 u to achieve sm thng new,
So try to practice with a bigger banana
Fri:
It’s a dull day,all boys busy in Juma prayer
Sat:
2nyt is gud 4 SEX
Sun:
U will get Gud news tht u r not pregnent
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PHUDI
All the girls with ZERO METER Phudi plz stand up
All the girls with SMALL Phudi plz raise ur hand
All the girls with MEDIUM Phudi say YES
All the girls with LARGE Phudi plz leave the room
All the girls with EXTRA LARGE phudi plz
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PLZ
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PLZ
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Plz stop reading this SMS
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ZARURAT-E-RISHTA
ZARURAT-E-RISHTA
Anti Misba
Age 45
Divorced after 30 years of marriage
NO kids
Still Virgin/Zero meter
(Medical Certificate Attached)
X-Wife of
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PHATAN Major
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WORK n WORK (ok)
Saira:
Maa I m going to work,Suba waps aao ge
Aunti Misba:
No,NO,nhe I can let u do this,
Abi to tere phudi ur gand se
last time wale stiches b nhe khule
Saira:
Maa stiches phudi ur gand pr hai,
Pr naa to muu pr stiches hai
UR na he daanto pr braices …..
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BIG SIZE
All the people with BIG size LUN plz stand up
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All the people with MEDIUM size LUN plz raise ur hands
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All the people with SMALL size LUN please leave the room
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All the people with EXTRA SMALL size LUN plz
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PLZ
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PLZ
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Plz stop reading this SMS
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Biology Teacher
Biology Teacher:
Boys can u tell me exactly where ur heart is?
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ALL BOYS SHOUTED LOUDLY
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“Aunti MISBA K PASS”
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STAGE DANCE
Anti Misba ne stage pr aa kr dance kya
Sbne taali bjai
Anti Misba ne kapre uttar k dance kya
Kse ne talli nhe bjai
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Ek haath se talli nhe bjti
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KHIRKI
Parrosi to Major Rohail:
Raat teri khirki khilli C
Me bhabi de te tera SEX scene veikh lya,
Major Rohail: Lay haath sutt,Me ty raati ghar e nhe C
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WIVES
Satna’s BV
Janu sawera ho gya jago
Banta’s BV
Chaand dhal gya jago
Singh’s BV
Darling it’s dawn get up
Major Rohail’s BV
OY! Subha ho gae mera husbnd ane wala hai
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NURSE MISBA
Police: Why u fuck Nurse Misba?
Major Rohail:
Hospital said during delivery procedure NURSE MISBA will b ur mid wife
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MUSIBAT KA WAQT
Major Rohail:
Pta hai musibat k waqt Gadhe
ko b baap bnana pra hai
Aunti Misba:
Bhaee himat hy tumhari maa ke jo maan jati hai
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F.I.R
Major Rohail ur Misba ke shadi hoe
Mjor k khlaf Dehli Gate k logo ne Police me case kr dya
Why?
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Major Hmare Mohale ke RONAK le gya saala
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TANGE UR KHOLO
Major Rohail:
Aah aah tange kholo
ur kholo,ur ur zyada kholo
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Aunti Misba:
Ab kya TATTE b andr dalne hai
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Major Rohail:
Nhe waps bahir nekalne hai
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Pakar lo na…
Pakar
Pakar
Hath mein Pakar
Daba mt
Oh ho Qatray gir rhe hai
Jaldi se mu me daal le
Aaha
Ab bta mza aya na…?
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“RASGULLA KHANE KA”
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Horse & Chicken
Horse n Chick were good frnds
1 day Horse fell into river
Chick called a farmer,
who used his BMW to lift the horse
Aftr sm days,chick fell into the river
Horse lowered his DICK & pulled the chick out
MORAL:
If u hv big dick,u don’t need BMW to pick up chicks
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Kind Hearted
Bubbli : Wana Fuck?
Major Rohail : No I do not fuck unmarried girls
Bubbly : Why?
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Major Rohail : Muje khoon khraba psnd nhi
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